- Jason Davis

In what seems like a mildly desperate bid for attention from Ohio's elected officials - admittedly a group of people who could help them get a new stadium in the state capital - the Crew will play an exhibition match on the lawn of the Statehouse tomorrow in Columbus. Part of "Paint the Town Black and Gold Week", the match will feature a selection of players and conclude with a meet-and-greet where fans can chat with their favorite Crew stars. Or more likely, the reservist who drew short straw.

No word on whether the Ohio legislature will introduce a measure telling those damn kids to get off their lawn, or which trees will be the out of bounds line. Crew executives will be too busy glad-handing to care.

The event will last from 12:30 to 2 and is also meant to promote the club's home opener against New York this Saturday. Presumably news cameras will be on hand to capture the action. It's not clear how many potential soccer fans will be milling about the Statehouse ground on a Wednesday afternoon.

The Crew claim (sorry, replace "Crew" with "Clark Hunt and Mark McCullers") that it will take a new stadium for the team in the next five to ten years to keep the club competitive. They'll probably need state help to make it happen. As subtlety is unlikely to work (it is professional soccer, after all), doing the diametric opposite seems the best course of action.

Soccer on the Statehouse lawn is akin to "PAY ATTENTION TO US!"

Next year, a futsal game in the corridors of the Statehouse itself, or a juggling exhibition in the chamber.

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