- Keith Hickey
There are times when this whole blogging kick seems like a lot of trouble for not a lot of reward, but then something comes along that makes the work seem so worth it. Match Fit USA was recently given the esteemed honor of sitting down and interviewing U.S. Soccer Federation President Sunil Gulati.
Showing posts with label MFR. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MFR. Show all posts
Mid-morning, The Oval Office. It's grey and raining outside. A visibly tired President Obama is reading a file, only half paying attention. A secret service agent walks in, leading four other men. Three are dressed in suits. The third, a standard-issue USMNT warmup tracksuit. The President lays down the file and rubs his eyes wearily.
- Keith Hickey
This past weekend should have been about soccer. It should have been about star players like Landon Donovan and Thierry Henry finding their feet and finding the net. It should have been about Chivas USA grabbing their first win of the season. It should have been about wondering what has happened to San Jose. It should have been about a fabulous goal by this year's Next Big Thing.
But it wasn't.
Thanks to Brian Mullan, the big story this week was not soccer games, but the near-removal of Steve Zakuani's leg below the knee.
- Keith Hickey
So I didn't get to see as much MLS action as I would have liked this week. I was out of the house for nine hours on Saturday to cover a Union game and enjoy an adventure that included 3 buses, a train, a bummed car ride, and a considerable amount of precipitation. The next day, I had to talk myself down from the roof after Arsenal shit the bed, then my family wanted to take me out for dinner because Saturday was my birthday, so there was not a lot of time to see everything I wanted to.
So I didn't get to see as much MLS action as I would have liked this week. I was out of the house for nine hours on Saturday to cover a Union game and enjoy an adventure that included 3 buses, a train, a bummed car ride, and a considerable amount of precipitation. The next day, I had to talk myself down from the roof after Arsenal shit the bed, then my family wanted to take me out for dinner because Saturday was my birthday, so there was not a lot of time to see everything I wanted to.
-Keith Hickey
Because of a system which for the most part, encourages parity, it's never a good idea to come down too strongly when you're predicting a result between good teams, even if one hasn't played well too recently. So boy am I glad I made a cautious, reasoned argument about how I thought Colorado were in better form, but a team with the talent Dallas has should never be counted out.
Awww, crap.
Mea culpa, mea culpa.
Because of a system which for the most part, encourages parity, it's never a good idea to come down too strongly when you're predicting a result between good teams, even if one hasn't played well too recently. So boy am I glad I made a cautious, reasoned argument about how I thought Colorado were in better form, but a team with the talent Dallas has should never be counted out.
Awww, crap.
Mea culpa, mea culpa.
- Keith Hickey
Three home wins. Five draws. Parity’s a bitch.
At least Vancouver fans will be happy.
After all the exciting buzz around the start of the season (“Soccer’s bigger than hockey if you squint like this and pretend games on FSC don’t get their asses handed to them in the ratings by the WNBA and reruns of Pawn Stars and if you act like Seattle is representative of the average attendance of rest of the league! I‘m totes serious, for realsies!” ), we had a painful reminder of how far MLS has to go.
Three home wins. Five draws. Parity’s a bitch.
At least Vancouver fans will be happy.
After all the exciting buzz around the start of the season (“Soccer’s bigger than hockey if you squint like this and pretend games on FSC don’t get their asses handed to them in the ratings by the WNBA and reruns of Pawn Stars and if you act like Seattle is representative of the average attendance of rest of the league! I‘m totes serious, for realsies!” ), we had a painful reminder of how far MLS has to go.
Don't you wish your stadium was hot like this?
- Keith Hickey
UPS Guy: Could you sign here, Mr. Arena?
Bruce Arena: What's this?
UPS Guy: Overnight delivery from Sandy, Utah. Contents: Your ass. On a plate.
- Keith Hickey
Another MLS opening weekend has passed. And what a very good weekend for marquee signings. Hassli, Bravo, Davies, all scored two goals. I really hope David Beckham was watching.
Josh Wolff scoring and DC United winning? Hey, 2004 called. It's looking forward to seeing how Eddie Johnson's career turns out. And while we're on the subject of unrealistic expectations, my Fantasy team is proving that "Scrubs" isn't just a fantastic TV show currently in re-runs on Comedy Central.
-Keith Hickey
So Major League Soccer, the crazy druid/vegan cousin of the world soccer family, released the format of the 2011 Playoffs. Being bloggers, we found the new format underwhelming. Being arrogant, we decided we could make a way better system. Being alcoholics, we decided it would involve several five dollar bottles of vodka. Remembering nothing the morning after, we pieced together various notes found around the Match Fit USA offices as well as we could. This is what we came up with.
So Major League Soccer, the crazy druid/vegan cousin of the world soccer family, released the format of the 2011 Playoffs. Being bloggers, we found the new format underwhelming. Being arrogant, we decided we could make a way better system. Being alcoholics, we decided it would involve several five dollar bottles of vodka. Remembering nothing the morning after, we pieced together various notes found around the Match Fit USA offices as well as we could. This is what we came up with.
-Keith Hickey
Suppose I asked you, dear reader, to name the best player on the New England Revolution. You'd probably say it was captain Shalrie Joseph. And you would, of course, be right. Joseph is the Revs' engine room, skipper, and various other vital nautical accoutrement (poop deck!).
Suppose I asked you, dear reader, to name the best player on the New England Revolution. You'd probably say it was captain Shalrie Joseph. And you would, of course, be right. Joseph is the Revs' engine room, skipper, and various other vital nautical accoutrement (poop deck!).
The schedule is out. The rosters are set, mostly. Even Davey B. has promised that he'll "like totally, definitely, have some of that pre-season" as soon as he's done playing footsie with Gareth Bale. And there's still a month of nothing left to go.
I miss the CBA. At least it was something to talk about.
Welcome, fellow footy fans! It's your favorite pro-promotion proselytizers again, the Revolutionary Council for American Soccer Change. As we all watch Premiership football every weekend, we figured it was time to release guidelines on how you should be watching, to make sure you're doing it properly.
by Keith Hickey
The 2011 SuperDraft will be taking place in Baltimore this week, and there are plenty of young players hoping their names will be called and they’ll be offered contracts. But there’s a lot of confusion and speculation going around about which teams will draft which players. And anytime there’s confusion, Match Fit Reserve is ready and willing to add to the chaos. And thus, we present the 2011 Match Fit Reserve Mock SuperDraft.
First Pick: Vancouver Whitecaps select Perry Kitchen, Akron
MFR’s Take: This is a solid move for Vancouver. Kitchen is one of the highest rated players in the draft, a national champion, and the type of player you can build a team around for years to come.
Second Pick: Portland Timbers select Stuart Holden, Bolton Wanderers
MFR’s Take: A bit of a gamble for Portland, who also hold the rights to recently departed MLS-ers Robbie Findley and Jonathan Bornstein. But if Holden decides that being paid huge amounts of money as the focal point of a Premiership team pushing for Europe isn’t for him, this could be a big steal by John Spencer.
Third Pick: D.C. United select the Real Estate Section, Baltimore Sun
MFR’s Take: Some teams look to build for the future. And some teams actually look for real estate to build on. D.C. need a new stadium more than they need any one player on the field. I think it’s fair to say however, that this selection is something of a project.
Fourth Pick: Chivas USA selects Omar Salgado, unattached
MFR’s Take: This seems an odd pick to me, as Salgado had his contract terminated by Chivas Guadalajara for opting to represent the United States. I’m not sure how well this is going to go over with the parent club’s mana- what’s that? There you go, he’s already been cut.
Fifth Pick: Philadelphia Union select Chris Seitz, FC Dallas
MFR’s Take: The Union never seem able to make a decision about Seitz, do they? Paid a lot of money to Salt Lake to get him, dropped him when he cost them points, reinstated him for a meaningless game, left him unprotected in the expansion draft, then protected him, then exposeed him in the re-entry draft, and now they’re taking him in the SuperDraft? This one is a head-scratcher.
Sixth Pick: New England Revolution select John Henry, New England Sports Ventures
MFR’s Take: Some will call this something of a sentimental local pick, but it’s a smart, smart choice for the Revs. They’ve stuck by Robert Kraft for a long time, but he’s past his prime as Revolution owner. Henry is younger, possesses great fundamentals, and has some experience in Europe.
Seventh Pick: Houston Dynamo select Chris Wondolowski, San Jose Earthquakes
MFR’s Take: There was an obscure clause in the franchise agreement with Houston that they can have any player they want from San Jose at any time, and they’re exercising that clause to pick up the league’s top scorer in Wondolowski. Could be the player Houston needs to get back to the playoffs.
Eighth Pick: Vancouver Whitecaps (Acquired from Toronto) select Dwayne De Rosario, Toronto FC
MFR’s Take: Surprisingly, much of the interest was generated from the player’s end, who wanted to play for a Canadian team with a chance of making the playoffs.
Ninth Pick: Chicago Fire select Mike Ditka, unattached
MFR’s Take: If Saturday Night Live has taught us anything, it’s that people from Chicago love Mike Ditka. He’s a winner, and thanks to the movie Kicking and Screaming, he has experience coaching soccer.
Tenth Pick: Sporting Kansas City select Predrag Radosavljević, unattached
MRF’s take: Preki is a Kansas City soccer legend, and with their recent re-branding, KC need some heritage to tie the new name to the old traditions. Recently let go by Toronto, Preki will be itching to get involved again.
Eleventh Pick: Seattle Sounders select Konrad Warzycha, Ohio State
MFR’s Take: You hear sometimes of teams taking players just so their rivals can’t have them, and this seems like one of those picks. Sigi Schmid must really have it in for Columbus.
Twelth Pick: Columbus Crew select Terelle Pryor, Ohio State
MFR’s Take: This is obviously a play to put butts on seats, and if 100,000 people will watch Pryor play for the Buckeyes every week, maybe the Pennsylvania-born quarterback can draw 20,000 out to see the Crew.
Thirteenth Pick: New York Red Bulls select the 2000 MLS Cup, unattached
MFR’s Take: Now that the Kansas City Wizards are no more, the Red Bulls have decided to go for the one area where their club is still lacking, the trophy cabinet. Seems like if you can’t buy trophies on the field, buying them off of it is the next best way to go.
Fourteenth Pick: Real Salt Lake select Alex Morgan, UC Berkeley
MFR’s Take: Morgan’s a good, solid project who already has senior national team experience. 28 goals in the last two seasons at Berkeley, and a 2010 Hermann trophy finalist, this is a can’t-miss draft pick.
Fifteenth Pick: San Jose Earthquakes select Schellas Hyndman’s jacket, FC Dallas
MFR’s Take: Two words: Butter leather. Hyndman’s jacket was the talisman of Dallas’s run to the MLS Cup Final last season, but the former SMU coach surprisingly omitted the jacket from the final, which Dallas lost. San Jose picks up a proven winner here.
Sixteenth Pick: Los Angeles Galaxy select Victoria Beckham, unattached
MFR’s Take: The Galaxy pay a lot of money to David Beckham, and by any means necessary, they’ll have a Beckham on the field in 2011. No word on whether or not she’ll take the captaincy from Landon Donovan.
Seventeenth Pick: FC Dallas select the citizens of Dallas, Texas
MFR’s Take: An unorthodox pick, but you can see the reasoning behind it. If they’re all on the payroll, then they have to come to every game. No more sub-10,000 crowds at Pizza Hut Park.
Eighteenth Pick: Colorado Rapids select Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles
MFR’s Take: Colorado have shown they don’t need to be liked as long as they’re winning. Vick, with his image problems in the past but undeniable athletic ability, certainly fits that criteria.
The 2011 SuperDraft will be taking place in Baltimore this week, and there are plenty of young players hoping their names will be called and they’ll be offered contracts. But there’s a lot of confusion and speculation going around about which teams will draft which players. And anytime there’s confusion, Match Fit Reserve is ready and willing to add to the chaos. And thus, we present the 2011 Match Fit Reserve Mock SuperDraft.
First Pick: Vancouver Whitecaps select Perry Kitchen, Akron
MFR’s Take: This is a solid move for Vancouver. Kitchen is one of the highest rated players in the draft, a national champion, and the type of player you can build a team around for years to come.
Second Pick: Portland Timbers select Stuart Holden, Bolton Wanderers
MFR’s Take: A bit of a gamble for Portland, who also hold the rights to recently departed MLS-ers Robbie Findley and Jonathan Bornstein. But if Holden decides that being paid huge amounts of money as the focal point of a Premiership team pushing for Europe isn’t for him, this could be a big steal by John Spencer.
Third Pick: D.C. United select the Real Estate Section, Baltimore Sun
MFR’s Take: Some teams look to build for the future. And some teams actually look for real estate to build on. D.C. need a new stadium more than they need any one player on the field. I think it’s fair to say however, that this selection is something of a project.
Fourth Pick: Chivas USA selects Omar Salgado, unattached
MFR’s Take: This seems an odd pick to me, as Salgado had his contract terminated by Chivas Guadalajara for opting to represent the United States. I’m not sure how well this is going to go over with the parent club’s mana- what’s that? There you go, he’s already been cut.
Fifth Pick: Philadelphia Union select Chris Seitz, FC Dallas
MFR’s Take: The Union never seem able to make a decision about Seitz, do they? Paid a lot of money to Salt Lake to get him, dropped him when he cost them points, reinstated him for a meaningless game, left him unprotected in the expansion draft, then protected him, then exposeed him in the re-entry draft, and now they’re taking him in the SuperDraft? This one is a head-scratcher.
Sixth Pick: New England Revolution select John Henry, New England Sports Ventures
MFR’s Take: Some will call this something of a sentimental local pick, but it’s a smart, smart choice for the Revs. They’ve stuck by Robert Kraft for a long time, but he’s past his prime as Revolution owner. Henry is younger, possesses great fundamentals, and has some experience in Europe.
Seventh Pick: Houston Dynamo select Chris Wondolowski, San Jose Earthquakes
MFR’s Take: There was an obscure clause in the franchise agreement with Houston that they can have any player they want from San Jose at any time, and they’re exercising that clause to pick up the league’s top scorer in Wondolowski. Could be the player Houston needs to get back to the playoffs.
Eighth Pick: Vancouver Whitecaps (Acquired from Toronto) select Dwayne De Rosario, Toronto FC
MFR’s Take: Surprisingly, much of the interest was generated from the player’s end, who wanted to play for a Canadian team with a chance of making the playoffs.
Ninth Pick: Chicago Fire select Mike Ditka, unattached
MFR’s Take: If Saturday Night Live has taught us anything, it’s that people from Chicago love Mike Ditka. He’s a winner, and thanks to the movie Kicking and Screaming, he has experience coaching soccer.
Tenth Pick: Sporting Kansas City select Predrag Radosavljević, unattached
MRF’s take: Preki is a Kansas City soccer legend, and with their recent re-branding, KC need some heritage to tie the new name to the old traditions. Recently let go by Toronto, Preki will be itching to get involved again.
Eleventh Pick: Seattle Sounders select Konrad Warzycha, Ohio State
MFR’s Take: You hear sometimes of teams taking players just so their rivals can’t have them, and this seems like one of those picks. Sigi Schmid must really have it in for Columbus.
Twelth Pick: Columbus Crew select Terelle Pryor, Ohio State
MFR’s Take: This is obviously a play to put butts on seats, and if 100,000 people will watch Pryor play for the Buckeyes every week, maybe the Pennsylvania-born quarterback can draw 20,000 out to see the Crew.
Thirteenth Pick: New York Red Bulls select the 2000 MLS Cup, unattached
MFR’s Take: Now that the Kansas City Wizards are no more, the Red Bulls have decided to go for the one area where their club is still lacking, the trophy cabinet. Seems like if you can’t buy trophies on the field, buying them off of it is the next best way to go.
Fourteenth Pick: Real Salt Lake select Alex Morgan, UC Berkeley
MFR’s Take: Morgan’s a good, solid project who already has senior national team experience. 28 goals in the last two seasons at Berkeley, and a 2010 Hermann trophy finalist, this is a can’t-miss draft pick.
Fifteenth Pick: San Jose Earthquakes select Schellas Hyndman’s jacket, FC Dallas
MFR’s Take: Two words: Butter leather. Hyndman’s jacket was the talisman of Dallas’s run to the MLS Cup Final last season, but the former SMU coach surprisingly omitted the jacket from the final, which Dallas lost. San Jose picks up a proven winner here.
Sixteenth Pick: Los Angeles Galaxy select Victoria Beckham, unattached
MFR’s Take: The Galaxy pay a lot of money to David Beckham, and by any means necessary, they’ll have a Beckham on the field in 2011. No word on whether or not she’ll take the captaincy from Landon Donovan.
Seventeenth Pick: FC Dallas select the citizens of Dallas, Texas
MFR’s Take: An unorthodox pick, but you can see the reasoning behind it. If they’re all on the payroll, then they have to come to every game. No more sub-10,000 crowds at Pizza Hut Park.
Eighteenth Pick: Colorado Rapids select Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles
MFR’s Take: Colorado have shown they don’t need to be liked as long as they’re winning. Vick, with his image problems in the past but undeniable athletic ability, certainly fits that criteria.
It's the offseason, and I really don't want to waste brain cells on the Re-Entry draft, so I've whipped up a little interactive post for you guys. I was bored the other day, and got to thinking about a hypothetical situation where instead of a main US national team, each state had a representative side. I got most of four big states, but I wanted to open up the floor to see if I've missed anyone (I'm sure I have), and to allow readers to post the best XI or squad from their own state. I'll update this post as often as possible while we're doing this.
CALIFORNIA
GK:
Chris Seitz - Philadelphia Union
Nick Rimando - Real Salt Lake
Boaz Myhill - West Brom (England)
DF:
Heath Pearce - FC Dallas
Frankie Hejduk - Columbus Crew
Carlos Bocanegra - Saint-Etienne (France) (C)
Danny Califf - Philadelphia Union
Patrick Ianni - Seattle Sounders
Michael Orozco Fiscal - Philadlephia Union
Mike Chabala - Houston Dynamo
MF:
Landon Donovan - Los Angeles Galaxy
Sacha Kljestan - Anderlecht (Belgium)
Peter Vagenas - Colorado Rapids
Robbie Rogers - Comumbus Crew
Maurice Edu - Rangers (Scotland)
Luis Gil - Real Salt Lake
Chris Pontius - DC United
Jovan Kirovski - Los Angeles Galaxy
Eric Avila - FC Dallas
Jeff Larentowicz - Colorado Rapids
FW:
Sal Zizzo - Chivas USA
Chad Barrett - Toronto FC
Herculez Gomez - Pachuca (Mexico)
Tristan Bowen - Los Angeles Galaxy
Manager:
Cobi Jones
NEW JERSEY
GK:
Tim Howard - Everton (England)
Brian Edwards - San Jose Earthquakes
Chris Konopka - Waterford United (Ireland)
DF:
Gregg Berhalter - Los Angeles Galaxy
Ryan Adeleye - Hapoel Be'er Sheva (Israel)
MF:
Michael Bradley - Gladbach (Germany) (C)
Mike Seamon - Seattle Sounders
Eddie Gaven - Columbus Crew
Nick LaBrocca - Toronto FC
Stephen King - DC United
Danny Szetela - Unattached
Alejandro Bedoya - Örebro (Sweden)
FW:
Giuseppe Rossi - Villarreal (Spain)
Jozy Altidore - Villarreal (Spain)
Jemal Johnson - MK Dons (England)
Vincenzo Bernardo - Nola Calcio (Italy)
Manager:
Bob Bradley
PENNSYLVANIA
GK:
Jon Conway - Toronto FC
Patrick Hannigan - Unattached
DF:
Zarek Valentin - Michigan Bucks, University of Akron
Jim Curtin - Unattached
Chris Albright - New York Red Bulls
Jeff Parke - Seattle Sounders
Marvell Wynne - Colorado Rapids
MF:
Bobby Convey - San Jose Earthquakes (C)
J.T. Noone - Philadelphia Union
Tony Donatelli - Montreal Impact
Jason Yeisley - FC Dallas
FW:
Marcus Tracy - Aalborg (Denmark)
Andrew Konopelsky - Newark Ironbound Express
Dan Antoniuk - San Diego Boca
Corey Hertzog - Reading United, Penn State University
Manager:
Ben Olsen
TEXAS
GK:
Tyler Deric - Houston Dynamo
DF:
Zak Whitbread - Norwich City (England)
Hunter Freeman - IK Start (Norway)
Nelson Akwari - Vancouver Whitecaps
Greg Garza - Estoril Praia (Portugal)
Bobby Boswell - Houston Dynamo
Drew Moor - Colorado Rapids
Brede Hangeland - Fulham (England)
Omar Gonzalez - Los Angeles Galaxy
MF:
Daniel Hernandez - FC Dallas (C)
Davy Arnaud - Sporting KC
Clint Dempsey - Fulham (England)
Jose Francisco Torres - Pachuca (Mexico)
Lee Nguyen - Becamex Bình Dương (Vietnam)
Shea Salinas - Vancouver Whitecaps
Jay Needham - Orlando City
Jamie Watson - Orlando City
Francisco Navas - Houston Dynamo
FW:
Omar Salgado - Unattached
Sonny Guadarrama - Atlante (Mexico)
Brek Shea - FC Dallas
Conor Doye - Derby (England)
Corben Bone - Chicago Fire
Manager:
Jeff Agoos
VIRGINIA
GK:
Bill Hamid - D.C. United
Matt Van Oekel - NSC Minnesota Stars
Alexander Stopa - University of Louisville
DF:
Devon McTavish - D.C. United
Clarence Goodson - IK Start (Norway) (C)
Danny Cruz - Houston Dynamo
John Gilkerson - Carolina Railhawks
Josh Rice - University of North Carolina
David Walden - University of North Carolina
MF:
Corey Ashe - Houston Dynamo
Conor Shanosky - D.C. United
Brian Carroll - Philadelphia Union
Bobby Foglesong - Richmond Kickers
Jordan Cyrus - University of Maryland
John Sterzter - University of Maryland
Nicholas Abrigo - College of William and Mary
FW:
Brandon Massie - Charleston Battery
Roger Bothe - Richmond Kickers
Jordan Evans - Richmond Kickers
Trevor McEachron - Richmond Kickers
Alan Koger - College of William and Mary
Brian Ownby - University of Virginia
Manager:
Wade Barrett
CALIFORNIA
GK:
Chris Seitz - Philadelphia Union
Nick Rimando - Real Salt Lake
Boaz Myhill - West Brom (England)
DF:
Heath Pearce - FC Dallas
Frankie Hejduk - Columbus Crew
Carlos Bocanegra - Saint-Etienne (France) (C)
Danny Califf - Philadelphia Union
Patrick Ianni - Seattle Sounders
Michael Orozco Fiscal - Philadlephia Union
Mike Chabala - Houston Dynamo
MF:
Landon Donovan - Los Angeles Galaxy
Sacha Kljestan - Anderlecht (Belgium)
Peter Vagenas - Colorado Rapids
Robbie Rogers - Comumbus Crew
Maurice Edu - Rangers (Scotland)
Luis Gil - Real Salt Lake
Chris Pontius - DC United
Jovan Kirovski - Los Angeles Galaxy
Eric Avila - FC Dallas
Jeff Larentowicz - Colorado Rapids
FW:
Sal Zizzo - Chivas USA
Chad Barrett - Toronto FC
Herculez Gomez - Pachuca (Mexico)
Tristan Bowen - Los Angeles Galaxy
Manager:
Cobi Jones
NEW JERSEY
GK:
Tim Howard - Everton (England)
Brian Edwards - San Jose Earthquakes
Chris Konopka - Waterford United (Ireland)
DF:
Gregg Berhalter - Los Angeles Galaxy
Ryan Adeleye - Hapoel Be'er Sheva (Israel)
MF:
Michael Bradley - Gladbach (Germany) (C)
Mike Seamon - Seattle Sounders
Eddie Gaven - Columbus Crew
Nick LaBrocca - Toronto FC
Stephen King - DC United
Danny Szetela - Unattached
Alejandro Bedoya - Örebro (Sweden)
FW:
Giuseppe Rossi - Villarreal (Spain)
Jozy Altidore - Villarreal (Spain)
Jemal Johnson - MK Dons (England)
Vincenzo Bernardo - Nola Calcio (Italy)
Manager:
Bob Bradley
PENNSYLVANIA
GK:
Jon Conway - Toronto FC
Patrick Hannigan - Unattached
DF:
Zarek Valentin - Michigan Bucks, University of Akron
Jim Curtin - Unattached
Chris Albright - New York Red Bulls
Jeff Parke - Seattle Sounders
Marvell Wynne - Colorado Rapids
MF:
Bobby Convey - San Jose Earthquakes (C)
J.T. Noone - Philadelphia Union
Tony Donatelli - Montreal Impact
Jason Yeisley - FC Dallas
FW:
Marcus Tracy - Aalborg (Denmark)
Andrew Konopelsky - Newark Ironbound Express
Dan Antoniuk - San Diego Boca
Corey Hertzog - Reading United, Penn State University
Manager:
Ben Olsen
TEXAS
GK:
Tyler Deric - Houston Dynamo
DF:
Zak Whitbread - Norwich City (England)
Hunter Freeman - IK Start (Norway)
Nelson Akwari - Vancouver Whitecaps
Greg Garza - Estoril Praia (Portugal)
Bobby Boswell - Houston Dynamo
Drew Moor - Colorado Rapids
Brede Hangeland - Fulham (England)
Omar Gonzalez - Los Angeles Galaxy
MF:
Daniel Hernandez - FC Dallas (C)
Davy Arnaud - Sporting KC
Clint Dempsey - Fulham (England)
Jose Francisco Torres - Pachuca (Mexico)
Lee Nguyen - Becamex Bình Dương (Vietnam)
Shea Salinas - Vancouver Whitecaps
Jay Needham - Orlando City
Jamie Watson - Orlando City
Francisco Navas - Houston Dynamo
FW:
Omar Salgado - Unattached
Sonny Guadarrama - Atlante (Mexico)
Brek Shea - FC Dallas
Conor Doye - Derby (England)
Corben Bone - Chicago Fire
Manager:
Jeff Agoos
VIRGINIA
GK:
Bill Hamid - D.C. United
Matt Van Oekel - NSC Minnesota Stars
Alexander Stopa - University of Louisville
DF:
Devon McTavish - D.C. United
Clarence Goodson - IK Start (Norway) (C)
Danny Cruz - Houston Dynamo
John Gilkerson - Carolina Railhawks
Josh Rice - University of North Carolina
David Walden - University of North Carolina
MF:
Corey Ashe - Houston Dynamo
Conor Shanosky - D.C. United
Brian Carroll - Philadelphia Union
Bobby Foglesong - Richmond Kickers
Jordan Cyrus - University of Maryland
John Sterzter - University of Maryland
Nicholas Abrigo - College of William and Mary
FW:
Brandon Massie - Charleston Battery
Roger Bothe - Richmond Kickers
Jordan Evans - Richmond Kickers
Trevor McEachron - Richmond Kickers
Alan Koger - College of William and Mary
Brian Ownby - University of Virginia
Manager:
Wade Barrett
By Keith Hickey
With FIFA having shown to the World on Thursday that it doesn't matter if you're an insignificant backwater, you too can host a World Cup if you throw enough money at it, I figured it was time to propose a long-standing dream of mine.
FIFA should award the 2026 World Cup to my home state of Pennsylvania.
It may seem odd that if the country as a whole could not land the tournament, one state alone could even have a chance, but bear with me for a moment. Pennsylvania, at roughly 46 thousand square miles, is ten times the size of 2022 host Qatar. It has a population of over 12.6 million, roughly 7.5 times that of Qatar.
Slavery in Pennsylvania has been completely illegal since 1847 (and it was never that popular before then). In Qatar, a foreign worker may not enter the country without having a sponsor. The worker cannot leave without the sponsor's permission. Many sponsors do not allow the transfer of one employee to another sponsor (aka "Finding a new job). Confiscation of passports and withholding of wages is commonplace.
While same-sex marriage is not yet legal in Pennsylvania, the acts and social conventions associated with that lifestyle are. In Qatar, sodomy carries a five year prison sentence.
Pennsylvania was founded on the idea of religious tolerance. The law in Qatar is based on Sunni Islam, and Apostasy is on the books as a capital offense. Even non-Muslims are banned from eating and drinking in public during Ramadan.
Social issues aside, let's take a look at the hard numbers of infrastructure.
Pennsylvania could be divided into three zones for the World Cup.
The Western Zone, with Heinz Field (65,050 Capacity) and PNC Park (38,496) in Pittsburgh would be served by Pittsburgh International Airport.
The Central Zone, home of Beaver Stadium (107,282) would host the opening match and the final, and would be served by Harrisburg International Airport.
And finally, the more populous Eastern Zone would host most of the matches. It has a number of stadiums, including Lincoln Financial Field (69,144), Franklin Field (52,593), Citizens Bank Park (46,528), and PPL Park (18,500, but designed to be expanded to 30,000 with relative ease).
So that's six stadiums which would be ready with minor reconfigurations, and a seventh that requires moderate expansion. Since FIFA requires at least eight, we'll put up a temporary modular 30,000 seat stadium in Harrisburg, and when the tournament is over, ship it off to some impoverished backwater desperately in need of such a facility. Like D.C.
There are already extensive train and highway systems connecting all three host zones The light rail network may require some modernization, but that's a legacy project which will serve the state long after the tournament has left, and it's not like we have to build, say, a dozen air-conditioned stadiums in a desert the size of Connecticut.
That would just be stupid.
My predictions for the Western Conference Semifinals:
SJE over COL
LAG over FCD
So I pulled an o-fer. I'd be willing to wager that a lot of people did. I went for the scrappy underdogs in San Jose, and they got bullied around by the, um, scrappy underdogs of Colorado. But unless your upper appendages are reminiscent of prehistoric carnivores, you probably didn't have LA 0-3 DALLAS on your betting slip.
A lot of bloggers, journalists, and other pontificating mouths are saying this is great for the league and two small-market teams who've been around since the Analog TV days and could use a boost. That's probably true, but it doesn't make me any less annoyed. As a neutral, and cafepress boxer shorts wearing member of the "I hate Conor Casey" society, I don't give two Doug Logans about it. I wanted the attractive, big name grudge match of LA and San Jose.
And yes, I'm just being petulant because I whiffed like Kei Kamara on the last round. And bitter because I could have gone if I had a passport. Which I don't. Last time I went to Canuckistan, you didn't have to have one.
Looking at the teams that are actually involved, it's hard to separate them. Dallas gets the edge on defense, largely thanks to the best keeper in MLS history having something to prove. Colorado have the better offense, due the the more than a bit presumptively named "C+C Goal Factory." Dallas probably have a better midfield, but Larentowicz and Mastroeni are hardly pushovers. Although Colorado lost to DC United this year, which should probably have meant automatic playoff elimination on the basis of league pride alone.
I'm going for the Dallas win. 1-0, with an "Are you watching, LA/KC/Keeper of the year voters?" performance from Hartman
-----Intermission. Match Fit Reserve brand cola available in the lobby.-----
The other big story was the USMNT B team going back to South Africa and kicking its dog. They complained about us not bringing the first team, because obviously, a bit of metal with their national demigod's name on it is more important than the MLS playoffs.
Then we found out during the pregame show that some South African player who couldn't win a spot on the dead-last 2008 Quakes was offended that he wasn't called up for the USMNT despite not having a US passport. And they had those fucking vuvuzelas. Apologies for the language folks, but the South Africans were shitty hosts.
And after all their bitching and whining in an accent that sounds like a mentally deficient New Zealander? They get shown up by the Rugrats. Tim Ream had a solid, smooth debut without any major errors, which is precisely what you want from a player in his position at his age. Teal Bunbury showed the makings of a true target man. Eric Lichaj, apart from one stupid challenge, was fantastic, dealing with a lot of traffic on his flank. Mix Diskerud may be my favorite of the newbies. I've heard a lot about him before, and it was exciting to see him play so well on his debut. He's got a fantastic first touch, a fair lick of speed in him, and the inventiveness of his assist was delicious; the willingness to try that in the box on his debut is just so absolutely pleasing.
And then there's America's new record youngest goalscorer, Juan Agudelo. I was against him going. I didn't think he'd earned it, and I thought he was too young, but all credit to him, he had an opportunity and made the most of it. I'm excited to see more of him, but hesitant to jump on any sort of bandwagon. I've been burned before. I'll wait until he pulls a Geoff Hurst before I'll admit he's not another Freddy Adu or Eddie Johnson.
This was the second time we've won the Nelson Mandela Challenge Cup. If we do it again, do we get to keep Mandela?
-KH
Your nets can only hope to contain him.
The rest of this post has a distinct lack of Conor Casey. Somewhat because I can’t stand the “let’s kick it at the big guy’s head and see if it goes in” soccer, partly because nobody in the history of MLS can remember a notable game involving Colorado. They’re a very beige team. Which probably means he’ll score a hat trick in the last 4 minutes of the MLS Cup Final when down 2-0 with two men sent off. And cure Taylor Twellman’s concussions.
Moving swiftly onward. My predictions from before the playoffs started:
RSL over FCD
COL over CLB
LAG over SEA
SJE over NYRB
Three outta four, baby. It’s not perfect, but it’s better than I did in 11th grade chemistry. The only game I missed was RSL/Dallas, which is just further proof that I’m terrible predicting anything having to do with Robbie Findley. Who seems to think that being useless in the World Cup is somehow worthy of a move to Europe. Have fun in the Allsvenskan, buddy. But I digress. This post is about people who don’t choke in the MLS Cup playoffs.*
And Landon Donovan.
The playoffs isn’t about who’s the best team, it’s about who’s hot right now. That’s why San Jose, who play the 8-Convey-Wando** formation, beat the Red Bulls and are going to beat Colorado, whose main threat is about as mobile as the Rockies. Of course, it helps to have the best team and be the hot club. Which is why I’m taking the Galaxy to win it all. Going out on a limb, I know. But the Galaxy have the most dangerous trio since Caesar, Pompey and Crassus, and it only takes one Beckham set piece, one Donovan counter-attack, or one of whatever Buddle does before he scores, and the Gals have their hands on the trophy named after their petty cash drawer.
“And what of Dallas?” you ask, being the kind of perceptive, intelligent reader that leaves insightful and constructive comments and doesn’t pick on Jason’s spelling and grammar. To which I respond “Dallas are a solid team built on a decent defense backed up by great goalkeeping.” And for that reason exactly, I hope they lose miserably. Nobody wants a boring champion. Especially one that plays its home games in front of 80 people. Nothing against the Burn or either of its fans, who I’m sure are lovely, if misguided, people, but that’s a terrible advertisement for the league.
As is the team in the biggest media market and home of three DPs going out to the lowest-seeded team in the playoffs in front of their own fans on national television (Suck it, North Jersey). We don’t need a final not involving LA.***
*Yes, I’m aware he won it all last year and scored a substitute goal against Dallas, but it’s worth the suspension of reality for a moment just to shoehorn in this upcoming dig at Landon. Sorry for ruining the punchline, by the way.
**Joke adapted from an original quip from my buddy Mark Dunfee (@SoBBolton on twitter). He’s kind of an ass, but occasionally funny. There, you have credit. Happy?
***This is a fake footnote. Consider it a DVD extra. In that spirit, here’s some commentary: This post was written around midnight, while I was craving a sandwich. Preferably tuna. I listened to the albums Pinkerton by Weezer and Is This It by The Strokes while I was writing.
This is the face of greatness
And while I realize that emotions are running high, I don't quite get the hate for the name "Orlando City SC." Is it kinda clunky and an obvious bit of europosing? Sure, but it could have been worse. It could have been Lokomotiv Orlando. Orlando Albion. Bayern Orlando FK. CD Chivas USA.
Now that I've gotten that out of my system like so much bad Taco Bell, let's talk playoffs. Or as it will be known in the next round, the Western Conference Cup. Because right now, I have very little confidence in the two East teams. Columbus has played quite a lot of matches with a squad boasting an average age of seventy eight, winning just one of their last seven games (Against nothing to play for Philly, so it barely counts), and to top it off, Will Hesmer is out for the season with a Danny Califf'd shoulder. Against the physical presence of USMNT rejects like Pablo Mastroeni and Conor Casey, I don't see the Crew playing going beyond two.
Interesting side note, the other keeper besides Hesmer to score a goal in MLS? Danny Cepero, against Hesmer's backup and now, Crew starter for the playoffs, Andy Gruenebaum. Stay strong, Nordecke.
As for the other team from the Rust Belt, it's not that the Red Bulls aren't good, it's that they're playing against Chris Wondolowski, who has ten goals in his last eight games. That's not just "hot." Five goals in eight games is "hot." Ten? Tim Ream better bring plenty pf SPF50 if he doesn't want to end up like a ginger in Phoenix.*
Looking to the West, the most difficult team to predict is obviously the Galaxy. I wouldn't be surprised to see them steamroll everyone and romp their way to a third MLS Cup. I also wouldn't be surprised if they rolled over and meekly went two-and-out against Seattle.
The Sounders themselves are a bit of an enigma, too. Over their last fourteen games, the boys in rave green have posted a 10-2-2 record with 22 for and 11 against. On the flip side, they've also been outscored 7-1 by LA this season, and the vaunted home crowd advantage they have at Qwest wasn't much help when the Galaxy put four past Kasey Keller in May.
That just leaves Real Salt Lake against FC Dallas left to cover. If MLS used a single table, Dallas would be playing the dead-men-walking Columbus Crew. Instead, they get to play the reigning champs. Who haven't lost a home game since May. Of last year.
My picks:
San Jose defeats New York
Colorado defeats Columbus
Los Angeles defeats Seattle
Salt Lake defeats Dallas
San Jose defeats Colorado
Salt Lake defeats Los Angeles
Salt Lake defeats San Jose
*That is, burnt beyond recognition.
The internet has exploded recently with the revelation that this decade's "Savior of English Football™," Wayne Rooney, is intent on leaving the favorite team of that friend of yours who also likes the Yankees, Cowboys, and Lakers. Cue wailing and gnashing of teeth.
Tintin goes for goal
Keith Hickey, Match Fit USA: I was covering the press conference following the Philadelphia/Salt Lake game, and one question kept coming back to me: Is there any soccer coach with better hair than Jason Kreis?
Jamie Watson, Austin Aztex: None. Nor calves. The dude looks like he's got calf implants. I got called tree trunk legs in school and he put mine to shame. He led the best ever rookie initiation I've ever seen or heard of when first year in Portugal. Still one of my favorite nights as a pro to this day.
KH: Go on.
JW: We had like 10 rookies doing rookie trivia he led one night out in Portugal and the stuff he said and came up with, it was hilarious. Or maybe I was really drunk, I don't know. All I know is, a lot of older guys were getting called out in front of everyone and the rookies had to write down who they thought did the embarrassing stuff and say it out loud in front of everyone who they picked did what and it was AWESOME!
KH: According to a recent article by Yanks Abroad, you’re currently with USL-1 side Austin Aztex. Are they aware that Texas isn’t actually abroad?
JW: Hahaha, it must have been a slow day at Yanks Abroad! Arch Bell is a good friend who knew my story so he wanted to tell it and I gave him alot of insight I hadn't given out yet, so I think I got a pass on it with the conidtion when I do go abroad one day, he gets the first article!
KH: In that same article, it says you were living with four other Aztex players. How bad did that place smell?
JW: 2 Scousers from Liverpool, a Geordie from Newcastle and a hispanic guy from Laredo which is the Mexican-American border, basically. Mexico and England would definitely be in the final if there was a Bad Breath World Cup.
KH: Not to mention 5 pro athletes sharing a bathroom. You guys must have gone through Febreeze by the gallon.
JW: The bad part is, none of them knew what that was! And when I'm left to be the house mom doing chores and cleaning responsibility, that's when you know the house is in trouble! I hate that stuff and quit after 5 minutes. It only got clean if a girl was coming over.
KH: Which was a stupider sequel, Boondock Saints 2, or Green Street Hooligans 2?
JW: GSH... Just leave it alone and let the first one be good by itself. Plus, I can't take Elijah Woods seriously as a soccer fan, he looks like his voice would crack the first time he tried cheering!
KH: Favorite soccer video game?
JW: Pro evolution. Don't even try challenging me at that. It's just stupid to do that.
KH: Of all the players you’ve played with professionally, who had the worst taste in music?
JW: I might have to embarrassingly admit it's me. My iPod is full of guilty pleasures and top 40 for days. I am legit terrified to leave my iPod on shuffle in the locker room since I'm the team DJ, because I'm afraid of walking back into the locker room and something awful is playing.
KH: Did you take it personally that RSL took Nik Besagno before you?
JW: No, I knew they were going to. It wasn't a shock to anyone really, everyone knew. I knew I was going #13 at the latest. When I was at the draft and certain teams were up, I was like "please don't take me, please don't take me, I don't wanna live there."
KH: How often do you edit your own Wikipedia entry?
JW: Never. I should edit that picture they have of me on there, it looks ridiculous! I need to go get a few glamor shots done and put one up there.
KH: No offense, you look like Tintin.
JW: That's funny, I was just about to say Tintin is a strinkingly handsome fellow. I've embraced it. Euan holden tagged me with it back in '08 and it's stuck with the fans and I can't shake it now.
KH: When living in Utah, how many people tried to convert you to Mormonism?
JW: I never figured out which older guy sent the missionaries out to my house over and over again but everytime I offered them a beer and said thanks but no thanks and sent them along their way on the bikes!
KH: Your Twitter handle is @JamieWatson22, and yet your squad number is 77. Do you blame Generation Adidas for pulling you of college early and ruining your basic math skills?
JW: I guess they taught basic math second semester second year and I missed out on that! Real answer is I didn't think I was going to even like twitter when I joined in, and so I used my email address as my tag. If I could change it now I would definitely change it to @imnottintinyoujerks
KH: You can change it, you know.
JW: You can?
KH: Yeah. Settings > Account > Username
JW: Wait, let me write that down. I'm an idiot.
KH: Thanks for your time.
